What is My Alter?

Day 11 of the Capture the Grief project: ALTER

I don't have an place in my home dedicated to my angel yet, just like I don't really have a specific place where I visit her (well, except for my running). But I am still working on the scrapbook. In fact, I got most of it done this evening. I just need to print out the photos for it to be complete (see the picture below - on the purple square, I plan to glue a photo). I included ANYTHING that was related to angel baby. Ultrasound pics, pregnancy tests, bibs from races that I completed while pregnant (2 half marathons and a fun run!), the poems and items given to me at the hospital on the day of the D&C, the cards sent to me from my friends and family, and several photos of me while I was pregnant (events I attended, places I went, etc). Everything that is related to angel baby deserves to be in there. I haven't figured out the perfect spot in my house for the scrapbook but once I do, that will be the alter referred to in day 11's prompt. I plan to light a candle on the 15th (Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day) and the candle will sit next to this book.

For now, though, the photo below captures my current alter, which is wherever I happen to be working on the memory book. This time is very special for me. Sometimes I get too sad and have to stop. Other times, like today, it helps to know that I am dedicating time specifically to angel baby. I am *thisclose* to finishing the scrapbook and that makes me feel good.

(NOTE: This picture is not the best because it was hard to get the lighting just right.)