The Sun Will Rise Again

I have learned that pregnancy and infant loss affects 1 in every 4 pregnancies. It is way more common than I think many realize and there is a dire need for awareness. That's why I shared my own miscarriage story. I am 1 in 4, and I have nothing to be embarrassed about and no reason to keep quiet as some may believe. It's not shameful to have had a miscarriage. It's not something I will hide. So that is why I am participating in the Capture Your Grief project. I love the challenge of these types of photo a day activities. Plus this gives me the opportunity to honor my angel baby while also bringing awareness to a topic that is unfortunately viewed as taboo or uncomfortable by many.

You can find out more info about this project here.


Capture Your Grief, Day 1: SUNRISE.

The prompt today is sunrise. I actually did not do the prompt this morning. I happened to have trouble sleeping on Monday so I did it then. I woke up at 7am, got my coffee ready, grabbed a blanket because it was a bit chilly, and went outside. By the time I got myself situated, I could tell the sun was coming up but I couldn't *really* see it yet so I sipped on my coffee and waited. I spent that time soaking it all in... the crisp air, birds chirping, rustling of leaves, breeze blowing... and thinking about angel baby. I wondered to myself what she (my heart believes baby was a girl) would be like had she been able to live on this Earth, who she would have looked like, what kind of birth she would have had, what she will be like if/when I get to meet her someday. In that moment, it didn't make me sad to ponder these things. I don't know what it was about being outside so early that morning (hey, that's early for this evening shift counselor!), just drinking my coffee by myself. I felt peaceful, as if angel baby were there with me, surrounding me with love. Obviously I don't know if this was the case, but knowing that this photo challenge serves a purpose to my healing and possibly the healing of others gives me a sense of hope. Don't get me wrong, I have my hard days where I throw myself a pity party and ask myself why, and find myself jealous or overwhelmed with sadness all over again... I know I will never be the same after the loss, and that's OK. I'm still adjusting to my new normal. This experience reminded me that even in times of sorrow, tomorrow will always come and the sun will rise again.